Talking About Cancer and other Unmentionables

There are those who know I had cancer but never, ever, asked me anything about it.

Maybe they were too self-absorbed or they were uncomfortable having these sort of conversations. I feel invisible to them. Even today, there are those who avoid the subject. They ask me how am I doing, am I okay now but never ever mention the word 'cancer' once in the conversation.

If you are a friend, let me let you in on a secret: you can and should talk to me about my journey through cancer. Do not avoid this painful conversation. You will not upset me by asking how I am today after my bout with cancer. I want to talk about it but only if you ask.

Why? Merle Saferstein (quoted by Sheryl Sandberg in her book Option B) says it best: "Survivors want the opportunity to teach and not be shunned because they went through something unknowable. These aren't personal questions. They are human questions."

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